What is expected of groomsmen and bridesmaids at weddings?

“Bridesmaids and groomsmen are expected to do more than being in the spotlight.” I heard this phrase in a conversation this summer. There were a few slip-ups observed at a recent wedding by the groomsmen and bridesmaids that made the bride, the groom and their loved ones feel uncomfortable.. We thought an article like this might help young people who are groomsmen and bridesmaids at weddings, because often such slip-ups are made inadvertently or unknowingly.

I was also recently, just last week, bridesmaid at the wedding of Sandu Aprodu, coach at the Taekwon-Do club “Stolas Leukas” and Liuba Jacota, teacher at ScriTehInfo Computer School. We didn’t read such an article before the wedding, but we asked the bride several times what was required of us, insisted on discussing at a “meeting” and planning all the things. We also wrote a list of things expected of us. Possibly there were also slip-ups on our part, or perhaps there are things you think need to be added to the list in the article. I invite you to write them in the comments so that they will be a good help at the next weddings.

And while we’re on the subject, I recommend that you don’t miss the opportunity to attend the “Spiritual Counselling” session, where the course “Marriage Without Regrets” will be taught. It is a particularly important course for married people or those who want to start a family. Bible teachers will be trained at this session to teach this course in groups or individually. The course really is very important to study if one desires a marriage without regrets and it can make any marriage without regrets, even if it began with regrets. Each church member must submit a written recommendation from the pastor of the local church. Each student is asked to cover their own expenses for books, bible-study materials and food.

Discuss with the bride and groom what is expected of you

We get caught up with a lot of ministry in the summer and both the bride and groom and ourselves were busy, but we tried to find a day to discuss our contribution and what is required of us. We discussed things one at a time and wrote a list of responsibilities for each – who would take gifts from guests, who would lead the guests to tables in the hall and more. That way, everyone knew their responsibilities ahead of time and there was no worry for the bride and groom either.

Don’t miss out when your presence is important

I’ve heard of cases where groomsmen or bridesmaids have disappeared on the day of the wedding with little or no notice and didn’t answer calls. It is a great worry on the bride and groom’s head to look for other people in this role at the last minute and it is not nice to do so without any justifiable reason.

It is important to attend not only the wedding, but also the rehearsals, registration, photography, and any other help requested by the bride and groom. If something comes up, be sure to let them know and seek solutions.

Don’t leave the wedding earlier than the other guests

Stay after the wedding is over for as long as it is needed. Ask the bride and groom what you need to help them with and stay until needed. Don’t leave without announcing so that you disappear without a trace and the bride and groom are left alone, as there are organisational things you can help with at the end.

Be ready to respond to any request, offer all help

Along the way there may be various situations where your unplanned help is needed. Be ready to help with anything that is asked of you or that you see is needed. We have been asked by the bride and groom to respond to all requests from presenters, as they are conducting the wedding and need the help of the groomsmen and bridesmaids. Also, respond to all photographer requests, it’s just as important.

In particular the help of the groomsmen is often needed. I have often seen them running to carry, to bring something and I have seen them very responsive. At the end the presenters kept praising us groomsmen and saying we were good and responsive.

Take care of the bride’s outward appearance

This was the bride’s request and she was taught by other girls to instruct us so that in the pictures she can look nice and beautiful. It is especially the role of the bridesmaids, as they see her from the side and can arrange her dress, hair and make-up.

Keep smiling and and a good mood throughout the wedding

This point is not the last. I think we have been told this most often. The bride often asked us to be the most beautiful at the wedding and full of good cheer and smile throughout the wedding. I think it succeeded for us, because it was a very beautiful and cheerful wedding, with a beautiful, cheerful program and such beautiful music!

It’s not easy to run from morning to evening from photos, to registration, to registration to photos, then to the wedding and so on until late at night. Tiredness or other things that may come up can steal your smile and good mood. But, it’s important for the bride and groom and guests to see good cheer and joy on your faces.

If any worries steal the bride and groom’s joy, be sure to encourage them, help with what you can to resolve them or, if that’s not possible, direct their thoughts to the great joy they have so that nothing can overshadow their joy.

Pay attention to the wishes of the bride and groom

We got the colour wrong and didn’t get the one the bride wanted. It was a blur, but it’s good to make sure it’s what the bride and groom want and like. It’s better to go shopping together.

I invite you to add any other suggestions in the comments.

Translated by Liza Bîrlădeanu