How can I stop arguing with my younger sister who is 7 years old?
Relationships between brothers and sisters are very important, but they can become a burden if you are constantly arguing. Let’s see what are the causes of the quarrels between siblings and how to solve them.
I think the first and most common cause is:
Often the older siblings are jealous of the younger ones. Sometimes parents favor the little ones, but sometimes they don’t. If you have a younger child you have to pay attention at every step, because they do not realize the dangers to which they are exposed. That’s why the older ones get the impression that their parents love the younger ones more, but it’s not like that. If you let the thought live in your mind that your parents love your little sister more than you, then you will be hurt. You will end up like Joseph’s brothers, who began to hate him. If you do not fight with this thought, you will feel worse and worse so that you will constantly quarrel with your sister. In fact, it is not the cause of quarrels, but the feeling of jealousy in your heart that you have to fight
Now Jacob lived in the land where his father had sojourned, in the land of Canaan. These are the records of the generations of Jacob. Joseph, when seventeen years of age, was pasturing the flock with his brothers while he was still a youth, along with the sons of Bilhah and the sons of Zilpah, his father’s wives. And Joseph brought back a bad report about them to their father. Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his sons, because he was the son of his old age; and he made him a varicolored tunic. His brothers saw that their father loved him more than all his brothers; and so they hated him and could not speak to him on friendly terms. Then Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him even more.(Genesis 37:1-5 NASB)
Disobedience of the sister
The older brother or sister quarrels with the younger one because he does not listen to him. The older brother is upset that the little one doesn’t listen to him, and the little one doesn’t understand why he should listen to the older one, and it’s a vicious circle. But, because you are older and you have to be an example for her, you should help her understand that you want the best for her, that you love her. If your attitude springs from love, she will feel it and want to listen to you. After all, this is a commandment!
And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also.(1 John 4:21)(NASB)
Study for yourself – change yourself
It is important for you to study the Bible so that you have the wisdom to control yourself when an argument arises, and to calm it down from the beginning so that it does not lead to something worse, to tears.
The beginning of strife is like letting out water, so abandon the quarrel before it breaks out. (Proverbs 17:14 NASB)
So, study the Bible inductively. I recommend a study for children about Joseph. This study discusses many topics related to the relationship between brothers. Then another study: “Boy, have I got problems!” where the book of James is researched. James talks about trials and temptations. So you need to know not to give in to temptation when the quarrel approaches.
Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, but any fool will quarrel. (Proverbs 20:3 NASB)
Go to different study groups, whether English, sports, or computers, to be strong in the Word.
It is important to pray for your relationship with your sister. God can change her and you. When you have done everything that depends on you and the quarrels continue, let God work in her heart.
Seek to befriend your sister
No matter how hard it may be, do your best to win her. She is a blessing to you, look at her as a blessing. There are so many children who want a sister but don’t have one. So, it is a gift from God, treat her with love, respect and care. The way you behave with her, the way you talk to her is very important. That’s how you can win her!
Talk to your parents or your leader to help you
It is good to talk to your parents about your feelings. Tell them how much it affects you that you are constantly arguing with her. They can help you. If your parents are not with you, seek to speak with a spiritual leader who will guide you and pray with you and for you.
God bless you with a beautiful relationship with your sister!
Translated by Olya Trikolich