How to relate to your stepparents?

Question:

I know that the commandment to listen to your parents is very important, accompanied by a promise, but sometimes it’s hard to show respect for my stepfather, when he’s actually pretty indifferent to me and our opinions do not meet often. It’s hard because I miss father-daughter conversations that I need so badly now, during adolescence. I try to start a conversation, but it is if he doesn’t listen to me at all and I do not feel an “authoritarian” and solid shoulder as it should be. My grandmother is also step and she seems to be more interested in “her grandchildren” from another marriage. For lack of attention, I do not give them the level of affection and respect as I should give a father and grandmother of blood. For this reason, I feel sometimes that I give rein to rebellion and disobedience against both parents. I would like to have these people closer to my heart, but it is difficult if it does not come from them. So, how do you say that the relationship between children and stepparents should be?

They are parents

I realize how much it makes you suffer when you do not get the affection that you expect, but I want you to know that there are many children who do not have this affection from their own parents.With your stepparents you should behave like with your parents just because they have assumed the responsibility of parents and care of all your needs as they manage.

To listen to your parents (real or step)

The day when your father married your mother he assumed the role of the parent and the responsibility to grow you up.It is therefore very important for you to listen to your father as much as to your mother, as Scripture says:

Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you. (Exodus 20:12)(NASB)

Do not make any difference and be obedient in everything, without any rebellion and God will bless you in all.

Follow the example of Esther

I suppose you read the book of Esther from the Bible. If not, I recommend you to read it as soon as possible because you will receive much encouragement from reading it.Esther parents were in Babylonian captivity and died when she was still a child, and Mordecai, her older cousin, adopted her and grew her up.He gave her a beautiful spiritual education so later she had the courage to confront the enemies and save the entire Jewish people from annihilation. She became the wife of King Ahasuerus and when she described her relationship with Mordecai, her step father, the Scripture says thus:

Esther had not yet made known her kindred or her people, even as Mordecai had commanded her; for Esther did what Mordecai told her as she had done when under his care. (Esther 2:20)(NASB)

Mordecai was a holy man who taught her the Word of God and she had a special attitude of listening that has brought many blessings in her life and in the life of the entire people of Israel.

Be grateful

Even if your father and grandmother do not give you the affection you expect from them, you should always show your gratitude for what you are given and for the needs that are fulfilled.Learn to talk to them about things that interest them and so they will see that you don’t only look for their attention, but you are ready to give them attention and affection.This will improve your relationship more.

Translated by Felicia Rotaru