How to get to know each other when you don’t agree to date?

These days I received an email, asking me the following question:

I once heard a show that you had on the Univers FM radio station, namely about young people before marriage. I was a little shocked that it is not good for young people to date before marriage. Well, then how will they know each other? I think this is also quite important before marriage.

You can also find the truths that I presented in the radio show in the articles that I have placed on this portal and you can return to them at any time. In those articles I presented well the definition of those dates that are not good for young people to have before marriage. Here is my answer to the question I was asked. So how will young people who do not go out and do not agree to date before marriage get to know each other?

Knowledge of the person before marriage is very limited

Especially when a girl or a boy wants to please a person of the opposite sex, he will do everything to please and highlight only the good qualities of character or even try to show some qualities that in reality he does not have and, thus, it will mislead the other person. I have heard so many times from people who come to ask for advice on family problems as they say: “I never imagined in my life that my husband had such a character or that he could behave as he does now. He was the most tender and caring man until marriage. Why isn’t he like that now?” The answer is simple – because, in fact, he never was the way he presented himself. When he behaved that way, he wanted to impress you and present qualities that you would have liked for him to have, but which in reality he never had. Only when you get married will you be able to see the true face of this man. In fact, you can see now if you don’t agree to go out on dates because…

The beautiful character of a man cannot remain in the shadows

If you are such a person, you will not go unnoticed by the person who will want to make a marriage covenant with you. This beauty of your character will be seen in the way you relate to all people, to those from whom you do not expect anything in return, whom you do not want to impress, but to help, to serve. You can’t play theater with all people to show other qualities than the ones you have. That is why you should value people of good character. Your character will be seen by others to the extent that you serve them and are ready to serve people. For that reason…

Take care of the things of God

The Apostle Paul writes in the First Epistle to the Corinthians as follows:

The woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; (1 Corinthians 7:34)( NASB)

and then further, when arguing why it is good for young people not to make a priority of the problem and need of marriage he says:

I say this for your own benefit, not to put a restraint on you, but to promote what is appropriate and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord. (1 Corinthians 7:35)( NASB)

The very service you do to God and to men will bring out the beauty of your character, and it will not be overshadowed, it will be noticed by the man who values character, and you will be asked in marriage.

May God bless you with wisdom so that you can understand these truths and trust fully in His will, because

The hope of the righteous is gladness, but the expectation of the wicked perishes. (Proverbs 10:28)9 NASB)

I invite all those who got married without accepting to date to testify about how they met. This will help readers a lot. Thank you in advance for these comments.

Translated by Ina Croitoru