How to act when teachers mistreat you?

Not long ago I was at a meeting with the parents of the group where our daughter, Nastica, studies – at the Pedagogical College “Alexei Mateevici”  from Chisinau. I was chosen to be elected as the president of the parents committee at this meeting. From the begining I asked to have a discussion with the students, so that I may find out how we, as their parents, can help, support, and encourage our daughers at the studies. I tried to be relevant and to advice them as they were my daughters and I wanted to know what the problems which they confront with are. One of these problems is that sometimes they are mistreated regarding to marks by some teachers. We discussed, I advised them how to act and I have found useful to place these advice on our portal, so that others may benefit of them, especially because many students are devoted readers of this portal. So, how to act when teachers mistreat you?

 Don’t quarrel

Thise is the most important thing. Don’t flare up and don’t quarrel, because in this way you can get such kind of problems that you will not be able to get out of, until you end up with your studies and beware not to be even expelled because of this. Don’t hurry up to speak and to expose your opinion. Analyse all things well and understand what the reason is. Try to see the whole  panorama and not only your perspective. But don’t quarrel. The wise Solomon said in the Holy Scripures:

A quick-tempered man acts foolishly, and a man of evil devices is hated. (Proverbs of Solomon 14:17)(NASB)

So, guard your heart not to get angry and through evil devices to be hated by your teacher for the reast of the time you will study.

Don’t act arrogantly

The young persons, having the wish to assert themselves, don’t see how they pass beyond the limits and they become arrogant for many times. All their image, speaking, walking, clothes, etc. splash with arrogance. They don’t want to listen to anybody and try to impose themselves to all people. If you behave arrogantly with regards to your teachers, you will draw a certain attitude upon yourself. That’s why, beware and don’t behave arrogantly. Be wise, because…

A wise man is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is arrogant and careless. (Proverbs of Solomon 14:16)(NASB)

And then, the man that has a nice and rigtheous character, doesn’t try to impose himself, or to draw the attention upon him, but he isn’t credited as unobserved by anyone, because all people admire beautiful characters.

Reckon in your head well, before you go to ask for justice

When you go to express your ungrattitude regards the mark you have got, it is a way to say to your teacher that he is unright, or that he has mistreated you. Don’t forget that the teacher always has a lot of ways to prove to you that your are not a good student and that you don’t know the subject. I think you will not argue with me regarding to this. That’s why, before you go to ask for justice, firstly think at the consequences well and if it is worthy to do it.

Don’t spread bad words about the teacher

I would be glad to know that there is no any one in your class or in your group that “posts on the latest gossip”, but usually, there are such kind of people in the majority of human collectives. The worst is that they will not say exactly how you have said, but they will exagerate and you will not be put in a favorable light before your teacher. Take my advice into account and what the Scriptures says:

The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; the one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin. (Proverbs of Solomon 13:3)(NASB)

By the way, aren’t you curious to read the whole Book of Proverbs by yourself? You will receive very much wisdom for life.

Be positive when touching the problem

Let us say that at a subject you learn a lot and you answer well, but you get lower marks than those who don’t learn or don’t even answer well. In this case, you should better go and thank your teacher for the effort he/she has made to teach you, than to go and quarrel or to speak badly about your teacher. Then, tell him/her how much efforts you make to study the subject and ask him/her what would he/she advise you to do, so that you may learn the subject and get high marks. Do you see? You will tell him/her the same thing, but you will be positive and the teacher will feel apreciated and will be glad to help you. But it could also be possible not to change anything, especially if he/she is a person who wants money, or has a grudge against you, or any other reason… Anyway, acting so, you will communicate him/her what you have to say and it will not surely demand your realations. Don’t forget that…

On the lips of the discerning, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks understanding. Wise men store up knowledge, but with the mouth of the foolish, ruin is at hand. (Proverbs of Solomon 10:13–14)(NASB)

Ask for forgiveness

Maybe while you are reading my article, you realize that you have already manage to damage very much the relations with one of your teachers and that there is no any solution. If you knew these truths until now, you would not have the problems you face at the moment… Don’t desperate. Go to ask for forgiveness. This will only ameliorate your relations with the teacher, and your relation with God too. Be ready to ask for forgiveness from anyone you have made angry. The Lord Jesus Christ said in the sermon on the mountain:

Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. Make friends quickly with your opponent at law while you are with him on the way, so that your opponent may not hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the officer, and you be thrown into prison. Truly I say to you, you will not come out of there until you have paid up the last cent. (the Gospel of Matthew 5:23–26)(NASB)

And Jesus Christ taught us in the prayer “Our Father” and we pray in this way…

…and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors… (the Gospel of Matthew 6:12)(NASB)

Find out the reason of mistreating

I have already mentioned more reasons that could lead to what you call and conceive as mistreating you. Which of them do you apply to your situation? If I haven’t mentioned it, then what is it? Find out the reason and do your utmost to depart this reson from your relation with your teacher.

Put priorities on the relations with the teachers

Don’t pay too much attention to the marks, but to the relations with the teachers and don’t measure up the relation with them, with the marks you get. If you received a lower mark, or a negative one, doesn’t necessary mean that the teacher does harm to you or that he doesn’t accept you. Regards to this, I would like to advise you to read the article Reflections upon the appreciation of the students with the highest mark (A), that was also published in Ziarul Liber (Free Newspaper).

Be thankful

The teacher makes an effort to teach you and this effort has to be appreciated by the students. No matter what mark you get, go and thank your teacher at the end of every lesson for what you have been taught and for the effort he has made to teach you. Most people are arrogant and they don’t ever thank anyone for anything. Here is a story from the Holy Scriptures, that shows us the proportion of those who are thankful and of those who lack the sense of gratitude.

As He entered a village, ten leprous men who stood at a distance met Him; and they raised their voices, saying, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!” When He saw them, He said to them, “Go and show yourselves to the priests.” And as they were going, they were cleansed. Now one of them, when he saw that he had been healed, turned back, glorifying God with a loud voice, and he fell on his face at His feet, giving thanks to Him. And he was a Samaritan. Then Jesus answered and said, “Were there not ten cleansed? But the nine–where are they? Was no one found who returned to give glory to God, except this foreigner?” And He said to him, “Stand up and go; your faith [a]has made you well.” (the Gospel of Luke 17:12–19)(NASB)

What category are you a part of? Do you thank for all things, or do you consider them as you have owed them? Go tomorrow to thank your teachers, each of them, for their great effort they make. And now, in the end of reading this article, I advise you to think at your parents or at the people you are cared of by; what they mean and do for you, and go to thank them.

Come again tomorrow on this portal, because I want to advise you how to build up relations with your class or groupmates.

Translated by Djugostran Felicia