I read the article “What unites a man and a woman in a marriage” and was convicted and rebuked by the Spirit. I got married before I met the Lord. Living in a society where sexual immorality was seen as normal, my husband and I lived together before the wedding, and I didn’t even consider it a bad thing. Now I understand that through this we have defiled our marriage bed and we cannot have the Lord’s blessing over our marriage. What can we do now that we understand the sin we have committed?
We have all sinned in one way or another, whether consciously or unconsciously, willingly or unwillingly. The Lord Jesus came into this world so that we might receive forgiveness of our sins and deliverance from the bondage of sin. In his Epistle to the Corinthians, the apostle Paul warns the saints that those who live in sin will not inherit the Kingdom of God, and after listing several sins, including many sexual sins, the apostle writes that such were some of them, but no longer. are, because they have been cleansed and sanctified:
Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor those habitually drunk, nor verbal abusers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11 NASB)
In Christ we are new creatures:
Therefore if anyone is in Christ, this person is a new creation; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. (2 Corinthians 5:17 NASB)
And God promises that He will no longer remember our sins and iniquities if we enter into the New Covenant:
… for I will forgive their wrongdoing, and their sin I will no longer remember. (Jeremiah 31:34 NASB)
If you have been deceived and lived together before marriage, even being in covenant with the Lord Jesus, now that you have understood the sin you have committed, know that we have in the Father a Mediator, who is Christ the Lord, and you can come with repentance to Him and He can intercede for you before God:
My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; and He Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world. (1 John 2:1-2 NASB)
It is important to acknowledge sin and ask for forgiveness:
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous, so that He will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9 NASB)
The word “confess” in Greek is “ομολογωμεν” – / homologomen / and means to name things the same, that is, to name them as God calls them, to agree with God. In the context of the subject discussed, “confessing” would mean calling sexual immorality “immorality” and not “cohabitation” or “civil marriage.” If we call things different from what God calls them, even if it sounds more beautiful to our ears, it does not change their essence, and in God’s eyes immorality remains immorality, no matter what we call it.
So the chance for forgiveness exists for anyone who confesses their sin and renounces it. But the fact that you are forgiven will not nullify the consequences of your sin. Man chooses to sin in one way or another, but the consequences that will follow are decided by God, they are not man’s choice. It is important to gently receive the consequences of our sins. Let us not be like Saul and Solomon, who after sinning, did not want to accept the consequences of their sin. Let us follow the example of David, who when confronted with his sin acknowledged that he had sinned against the Lord and gently received the consequences of his sin:
Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” And Nathan said to David, “The Lord also has allowed your sin to pass; you shall not die. (2 Samuel 12:13 NASB)
As David fled from his son Absalom, who had rebelled against him as a result of his sin, as the Lord had said (2 Samuel 12: 9-12), Shimei the Benjaminite went after David and cursed him. Abishai the son of Zeruiah sought David to slay Shimei, but David told him to leave him alone, for if he cursed him, it was because God had told him to do so:
When King David came to Bahurim, behold, a man was coming out from there from the family of the house of Saul, and his name was Shimei, the son of Gera; he was coming out, cursing as he came. He also threw stones at David and all the servants of King David; and all the people and all the warriors were on his right and on his left. This is what Shimei said when he cursed: “Go away, go away, you man of bloodshed and worthless man! The Lord has brought back upon you all the bloodshed of the house of Saul, in whose place you have become king; and the Lord has handed the kingdom over to your son Absalom. And behold, you are caught in your own evil, for you are a man of bloodshed!” Then Abishai the son of Zeruiah said to the king, “Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? Now let me go over and cut off his head.” But the king said, “What business of mine is yours, you sons of Zeruiah? If he curses, and if the Lord has told him, ‘Curse David,’ then who should say, ‘Why have you done so?’” Then David said to Abishai and to all his servants, “Behold, my son who came out of my own body seeks my life; how much more now this Benjaminite? Leave him alone and let him curse, for the Lord has told him. Perhaps the Lord will look on my misery and return good to me instead of his cursing this day. (2 Samuel 16:5-12 NASB)
If you have sinned against the Lord in one way or another, we have a Mediator with the Father: come before the Lord with repentance and be ready to gently receive the consequences of your sin! The consequences, whatever they may be, cannot be compared to the eternal punishment that would follow if you resisted God as Saul and Solomon did, who refused to accept the consequences of their sins. The consequences of sin are usually related to the area in which you sinned. If you do not have fulfillment in your physical relationship with your spouse, do not seek fulfillment in an extramarital affair: it is not worth exchanging an eternity with God for a moment of pleasure here on earth!
I recommend the study on marriage “Marriage Without Regrets” and, if you are not married, I recommend the study “Someday a Marriage Without Regrets.”
Translated by Didina Vicliuc