What to do when your parents argue all day?


I have a big problem: my parents quarrel all day, and I pray to God constantly, but without an answer from Him. What could I do? I am completely worn down, I feel exhausted. I hope you can help me.

This situation is common in many families and creates an atmosphere of oppression not only for parents who quarrel, but also for their children and anyone who still lives in that family. It is very good that you pray systematically for an end to quarrels and for peace.

I don’t know how much children can manage to solve this situation, but they could still do something. Let us not forget, however, that there are situations in which no one can do anything, as it is written in the Scriptures:

When a wise person has a controversy with a foolish person, the foolish person either rages or laughs, and there is no rest. (Proverbs 29:9 NASB)

I pray that this is not the case with the situation in your house, but one thing is clear, that a wise person, since he will understand this, will no longer have any quarrel with the other because he does not reach any result and peace will not be made.

Since you are a child, one of the parents may feel disregarded by your intervention in their quarrel. Be very careful how you intervene and do it only when you are sure that you can contribute to the cessation and not to a greater ignition of the conflict. Don’t forget that:

Like one who takes a dog by the ears, so is one who passes by and meddles with strife not belonging to him. (Proverbs 26:17 NASB)

If you want to settle the dispute, try to do it without an argument. Starting to argue, you will only add to the quarrel and your share and the quarrel will increase.

Do not go out hastily to argue your case; Otherwise, what will you do in the end, when your neighbor humiliates you? (Proverbs 25:8 NASB)

Maybe it’s better to talk gently with each of your parents when the other doesn’t see and isn’t a witness, and tell him how much you’re upset as a child about their quarrels, you and the other kids, and how much you want him to let there be peace between them. If you speak wisely, you may have a positive outcome. Help each of your parents understand that because of frequent quarrels, you can no longer enjoy the other good and beautiful things they do for you, because:

Better is a dry morsel and quietness with it than a house full of feasting with strife. (Proverbs 17:1 NASB)

May God help you and give you wisdom on how to proceed in your situation.

Translated by Didina Vicliuc